A lot of questions but no answers

Its the end of the weekend and much has happened this weekend that I have no answers for. Doing weddings are a lot of work and the deejaying part of it can go either way. Last night was just another example of this.

I can understand that weddings are all about family and people having fun during the course of the evening but I do not know why people feel that once the music begins, the DJ has a magic wand which he will wave and the song will change automatically.

Song requests, for the same song once twice three times four times. I feel like an overdone Jukebox. Djing is an art and will always remain one. Its a journey that people are taken on by the artist but when people decide to write their own tales its a different story altogether.

I am doubting my interest in djing everyday, all the long hours in the studio and practice sessions day in and day out turn to dust on an evening like this and I wonder is it worth the headache? Is it worth the stress?

My club gigs are moderate and I always looked at weddings as a challenge but my recent experience with a few has not gone well at all.


This year has been really tough and hard on me. Yes I have found success in a regular job but is that really me? I ask myself that everyday and I always come up with the same answer, NO. I will do a job because I must not because I want to but will that turn out to be my saving grace in the end rather than my music?

Emotionally I stand drained, in a lot of ways I miss being married immensly but as a friend of mine put it, would you rather be lonely or be unhappy? Which one would you choose?

Someday I hope I can find some answers to some of the million and one questions I seek gratification to.

3 more days NYE and after last night, I am nervous, scared and worried that something may go wrong yet again and I may not be able to recover from that setback.